My Parents Don't Approve of My BF because of Religion

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Hello Ellen,
My name is Christie and I’m 25 years old.  My parents have been on my case ever since I started dating my current boyfriend Nick.  We’ve been together for 6 months and Nick is a great guy to me.  I couldn’t ask for a better person in my life.  My mom and dad are annoyed by him because he doesn’t share the same religious beliefs as my family does, and because he’s more laid back about a lot of things.  He’s got a great job as an intern at an Architectural Firm in New York City.  My parents are so narrow minded about everything on the face of the planet.  When I bring him over for dinner they make subtle remarks at how it’s a shame we can’t all be on the “same page” because of the difference in religion.  This hurts me, and I don’t know how to react to it at the moment with him there without making him feel uncomfortable.  How do you think I should approach my parents?  Let me know if you need more details. Thanks so much Ellen I am excited to get your response!
Christie

Dear Christie:
I think that next time you have plans to have dinner with your parents you should talk to them before hand. Tell them that you are very upset and hurt by how they treat your boyfriend.  Explain how happy he makes you and how much he means to you. Point out the things they SHOULD take notice to like how he respects you, etc.  Make sure you let them know that if they can’t change their ways, you will have to decline future dinner invitations.  Ask them if they are willing to change for you.  Hopefully, they are.  If not, then you will have to explain to them that you won’t be able to have meals with them or let them into your life as much if they are just going to criticize you.  Just make sure you are very honest to them about your feelings. I am sure they will come to their senses eventually. Don’t give up!
Good luck!
Ellen

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