Ask Away...: Breaking the Bad Dating Habit {{Advice}}

December 26, 2012

Breaking the Bad Dating Habit {{Advice}}

Dear Ellen:
I have been ruining almost every first date I've had in the past few months because I can't stop bugging them at the end of the date.  It starts with them saying "I had a great time" and then I immediately ask them "Are you going to call me, When can we hang out again, or when should I expect to hear from you."  None of them end up calling and the reason I know it's because of what I say to them is because when I say it I can see their tense expression.  What words of wisdom can you give me to stop being so desperate (or at least seeming like I am) so that I can land more dates in the future? Thank you so much for reading this!

photo by Priscila Darrevia PhotoRee
Dear Sarah:
First of all, play it COOL!   Keep telling yourself that you are quite a catch and you want to leave HIM wondering what the next thing is.  After the date ends, when he tells you he had a great time, just say "me too!"  then wait and see if he says something about doing it again in the future.  If not, then just keep playing it cool.  Go home, and wait until the NEXT night to send a text that says "Thanks again for a great time the other night! I had so much fun!"   And see if he responds back.   If he does, that's a good sign, but if not, then just let it go.  You don't want someone in your life that isn't as enthusiastic as you are now do you? If you don't get the response you want after trying all of that, then next time the date ends, say something like "I had a great time, hopefully we can do it again soon." That way you get it out of your system and you throw it out there for him to make the next move.  You HAVE to keep your cool!! Good luck!

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