Ask Away...: Helping Your Kids Deal With Divorce

Monday, June 6, 2016

Helping Your Kids Deal With Divorce





With hundreds of thousands of divorces every year, if you’re reading this, it’s likely you’ve been through one. Whether as a child watching their parents, or parents watching their children, it’s tough for both sides to endure.

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So if you’re currently going through a divorce, and want to know how to make it easier on your children, read on. Or, maybe you aren’t divorced, but your parents are. Perhaps you want to avoid making the mistakes they made with you, on your own children.

Whatever the case, I hope this information is of some use to you!

Let your kids know they’re loved

Sometimes, children think divorce is their fault. They may feel that being better behaved or quieter would mean their parents would be ok. As a result, their confidence takes a hit, which can affect their friendships and school grades.

So let them know it’s not their fault! Sometimes, we underestimate our young children. Having a mature one-on-one conversation with them will do the trick. Don’t try to hide them from the realities of life. Explain to them what’s going on, and why they’re not at fault.

Ensure your lawyer understands you

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Going through a divorce involves frequent trips to see your lawyer - and it can get tiresome. It can get even more tiresome for your kids, as they watch their parents leave the house every day. Or maybe you even have to take your kids along, which I wouldn’t recommend, but sometimes it’s necessary.

Having a lawyer that understands you and your case can help the case be resolved quicker. As a result, the suffering your kids will have to endure will be over, fast. Divorce isn’t a process that needs dragging out!

So take the time to make sure you hire legal aid you’re comfortable with. There are many options, like our recommended divorce lawyer, family lawyers, and even family friends. This could be that lawyer who helped your parents through divorce previously.

Get the family involved

If you’re going through the divorce, or have finished the process, ask your family for help. Children feel more at ease, and more relaxed, when they’re around their family. Perhaps staying with the grandparents once a week would be enough to take their mind off the situation.

You could also organize a family day out, to boost smiles all around. Having your family help to improve your child’s mood also takes some of the pressure off you, the parent.

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Don’t argue in front of your kids

Simply put, this is a big no-no. Unless you want to make their mood even worse, that is. Arguing in front of the children only makes them feel like it’s their fault, even more.

You don’t exactly have to be best friends, either. Just keep those heated debates and arguments for when your kids aren’t around.

All in all, just make sure you’re there for them. It’s a hard time for everyone involved, but it is possible to make it easier. Thank you for reading, and I hope the situation improves!

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