How to Say No and Feel Powerful

 

No is a powerful word. No can stop something bad from happening, it can draw attention when you need help, and it can assert your power. When you say no to someone or something you’re giving them your thoughts and also a command. Unfortunately, these days it seems like everyone is hesitant to say no and we’re beginning to say yes simply for the fact that we feel bad saying no. Feel bad saying no?!?! Why should you feel bad because you make a choice!? So I wanted to talk about the power of saying no today in the hopes that you’ll feel more comfortable with it in the future.

Saying No Let’s You Take Back Control

When someone tells you how somethings going to go or tells you that you aren’t allowed to do something and you argue back, you’re taking back control. Control of your life, control of your feelings, and control of the situation. You are either saying that you will accept something as it is, or that you’re not okay with it. If someone invites you somewhere but you really don’t want to go, so you say no, you just took control of your own happiness by choosing NOT to just do something because you were asked. This is a powerful thing. This means that you are taking control of YOUR life which is totally what you should always be doing. No one should pressure you into anything and you should NEVER feel obligated. TAKE BACK CONTROL AND SAY NO!

Saying No Establishes Boundaries

Whether it’s with your kids or your spouse, telling someone no can set boundaries and rules for what they can and can’t do when it affects you or your life as a whole. When your child has misbehaved all week and then they ask for a special privilege and you say no, you’re establishing boundaries that if they don’t follow your rules, they will not be able to do special things. When your spouse says they want to buy a really expensive piece of furniture for the house, and you check the budget and tell them that no it’s not wise and you both can’t afford it, you’re establish a boundary of smart purchasing decisions. When someone asks if you want to do something and you say no, you’re literally setting the boundary for yourself of what you will or won’t do. These are all very empowering situations.

Saying No Reminds You To Delegate

Whenever you have a full plate of tasks and someone asks you if you can take on one more thing, instead of saying yes then having a meltdown, say no. Then delegate the task elsewhere. No you won’t be able to pick your neighbor’s kid up from school today but maybe the neighbor on the other side can. You don’t even have to be the one that delegates, you can just give the suggestion. If your boss tries to give you an insane assignment and you literally already have 3 major deadlines you’re about to miss, you may have to say no. And then you can realize how crazed you are and begin delegating your tasks to others to make room for a new assignment or just for your own sanity.

Saying No Saves Your Sanity

If you were to say yes to every single event you’re invited to in real life and on Facebook, imagine how little free time you would have. You’d be tired, grouchy, and begin neglecting your regular household chores and things you take care of on a daily basis in your life. You do NOT need to attend every event, every dinner party, and every conference for work. You need to enjoy your life but not overdo it. Be selective and say Yes to the best of the best opportunities. This will make you more satisfied with the things you do say yes to.

Saying No Reminds You of Your Responsibilities

If someone asks you to volunteer for something and you say no because you just don’t have time outside of your responsibilities, you’re putting them first. That’s super important. Why would you sacrifice your own needs or the needs of your family for something that is not a requirement of you? You can’t miss work for 10 days to help a friend move across country if it means you won’t get paid, will have to pay for childcare for 2 weeks, and neglect your daily tasks you do. Saying no reminds you of what your priorities in life are.

Saying no is such an empowering thing to do. What have you said no to lately that turned out to be a wise choice?

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