Ask Away Blog: Dating For Divorcees Made Easy

Monday, July 23, 2018

Dating For Divorcees Made Easy



Getting back into the world of dating after being married for quite a few years can be a very daunting experience indeed. Firstly, you might find it nerve wracking just putting yourself out there and trying to meet new people. That’s not all, though, as many divorces find that the world of dating has changed massively since back in the day when they were first doing it. After all, when most divorcees were originally dating as teenagers, there was no such thing as social media and online dating! So, there will be a lot for divorcees to learn before they dip their toes back into this modern world.


Are you recently divorced and ready to start meeting new people? Here are some great tips that will make it a lot easier and less nerve wracking for you.


Wait Until You Are Truly Ready
First of all, before you launch yourself into dating, you need to ensure that you are 100% healed after your divorce. When relationships break up, it can also be emotionally difficult, especially if it means the end of a marriage. This could be made even more difficult if you shared children and need to sort out custody. You will certainly experience some major heartbreak and will need to take plenty of time to come to terms with being single and working through all of your emotions and feelings. If you start dating before you are truly over your ex, you will find that dating will be very stressful and could end up dragging up some of your negative emotions. So, wait until you are truly healed, and then dating won’t be such a painful experience for you, and you will also be a lot less likely to make some bad decisions.


Think About What You Want From A Partner

Next, once you are sure you’re ready for dating, it is super important that you consider the qualities and characteristics that you want from a partner. The best way to figure this out is to write two lists - one that contains things you want in a new partner and then another that contains things you don’t want. For instance, if you are quite sporty and love keeping fit in your spare time, you might also want a partner who shares these pastimes. Your list should also contain personality traits, such as honest and easy going. Even though the things on your list shouldn’t be completely set in stone, it’s good to have them for guidance once you do start meeting new people.





Try Online Dating

Even though this may not have existed the first time around you were dating, it’s still a good idea to try some online dating. This isn’t something that is considered odd anymore - everyone who is single will have tried it at some point or another! There are different platforms designed for online dating, and it might take a bit of experimenting to find out which one you prefer. There are the ones you can use as apps on your smartphone,
such as Tinder and Bumble, although these are usually aimed at young people. These are also associated more with hookups rather than long-term relationships. Don’t worry, though, not all of online dating is aimed at young people looking for their next hookup. Sites including Match often attract older daters who are looking to create some more serious connections. Once you are online, you can use these good conversation starters to get chatting. It’s a good idea to sign up for a couple of different dating sites or apps, so that you can get a taste of the kinds of platforms that are out there.
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Let Go Of Your Expectations

Once you are ready to start arranging some dates with the people who you connect with online or in real life, you need to make sure you let go of your expectations. After all, your next relationship isn’t going to play out like a Hollywood romance, so there is no point expecting to meet Hugh Grant or George Clooney while you are swiping through profiles on Tinder! In fact, it’s best to forget
about romantic movies completely and get rid of all your dating expectations. If you keep your expectations way too high, you will never be happy with anyone who takes you out on a date, no matter how lovely and compatible they may be.

Do Things That You Enjoy

Not too keen to start off with online dating? That’s fine, some people really don’t get on with it at all and would much prefer to meet someone in real life. The best way to ensure that happens is to start doing things that you enjoy, such as hobbies and activities. Then you just need to join clubs or societies to meet like-minded people. You never know, the love of your life might be waiting for you at one of these clubs! For instance, if you love keeping fit, you might want to start taking your running seriously and
join a club. No matter what kind of hobbies you are into, I’m sure there will be a local club to join. By improving your social life in this way, you’ll be able to make more meaningful connections with the people you meet.


Look Out For Warning Signs

Make sure you take things very slow when you start to date again. That way, you can get to know someone completely, and will be less inclined to fall for someone who isn’t being completely honest with you. Unfortunately, lots of older people are regularly targeted on online dating websites by scammers
and con artists. So, you need to make sure that you know all of the warning signs that you need to look out for.

Be Patient

One very last point to make - you need to be patient when you start dating again. A new relationship won’t happen overnight, so be sure to take your time meeting new people so you have the chance to meet Mr. or Mrs. Right!




Good luck entering the world of dating once again!











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